I need out of town, just for 20 minutes.
I love that I haven't talked to one of my best friends in over a month. Not really. I think that's throwing me off. And that things keep popping up, important things, that I'd like to talk to said friend about, get said friend's opinion. Being married is time consuming, I guess. And being married means you can't be friends with singles of the opposite gender, I guess.
It really isn't fun.
Friday, February 5, 2010
Monday, February 1, 2010
Hold on.
To me, the phrase "Hold on" means to either "wait" or to grab ahold of something because things are going to get rough.
I don't know which has been happening for me more. I'm waiting for the future to arrive. I'm waiting for things to even out. And I'm tying down my safety rope like a sailor in a storm and praying that it holds.
I guess that's fairly cryptic, allow me to explain some.
Yesterday, I took a leap of faith, hopefully for the right reasons. I have been a lousy friend to someone, and I prayed and prayed about how to fix that. I can't be the type of friend they want to be. And, hard as it was, I had to give that one up to God. The message that I got while praying yesterday morning was "Get out of the way, you're blocking the light." I had always been of the mindset that if God was going to work in this person's life, it was going to be me, because I was already there. But it seems that I was taking on God's job, trying to save them myself. Not my job, I need to back out, and give him the room to work. And have faith that he will, even if I am not the one doing it. And for me, that is difficult. But, it's a lesson I'll have to get good at, if I'm going to be a social worker.
Next up, waiting for the future to arrive. I don't know, I stress out alot about where I will be this summer, next year, in 5 years. By the grace of God, I will be doing social work. But, I guess that could change, which is something I don't often consider.
Anyways. I am off to try to figure out where I am living next year. Then homework, and hopefully getting more sleep. Being just a little bit sick (like I have been the past few days) is not fun.
I don't know which has been happening for me more. I'm waiting for the future to arrive. I'm waiting for things to even out. And I'm tying down my safety rope like a sailor in a storm and praying that it holds.
I guess that's fairly cryptic, allow me to explain some.
Yesterday, I took a leap of faith, hopefully for the right reasons. I have been a lousy friend to someone, and I prayed and prayed about how to fix that. I can't be the type of friend they want to be. And, hard as it was, I had to give that one up to God. The message that I got while praying yesterday morning was "Get out of the way, you're blocking the light." I had always been of the mindset that if God was going to work in this person's life, it was going to be me, because I was already there. But it seems that I was taking on God's job, trying to save them myself. Not my job, I need to back out, and give him the room to work. And have faith that he will, even if I am not the one doing it. And for me, that is difficult. But, it's a lesson I'll have to get good at, if I'm going to be a social worker.
Next up, waiting for the future to arrive. I don't know, I stress out alot about where I will be this summer, next year, in 5 years. By the grace of God, I will be doing social work. But, I guess that could change, which is something I don't often consider.
Anyways. I am off to try to figure out where I am living next year. Then homework, and hopefully getting more sleep. Being just a little bit sick (like I have been the past few days) is not fun.
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